The Thought Garden

I wanted to share a counseling technique I came up with and used a couple of weeks ago.  This technique is appropriate for school-age kids and adolescence--maybe even some adults that need a creative outlet.  Use your judgement on who is developmentally able to grasp the concept and benefit from this technique.  The goal of the thought garden is to promote self-awareness, assist in identifying thoughts/feelings/behaviors, help with self-talk concepts, and can be used to promote self-esteem.  The thought garden allows the client to get outside of his/her head in a creative way in order to work through thoughts and feelings.
Overall analogy: What are you feeding your garden?  What are you feeding you mind?

The Thought Garden

Materials:

A paper egg carton
Green paint
Pipe cleaners
Paper flower print outs- example: flowers
Construction paper
Scissors
Scotch tape  
Markers and crayons
Different colored marbles/gems, rocks- river or pebbles, and dry beans.
Print-outs from therapistaid.com: list of emotions OR positive traits

Preparation:

Cut the top off the egg carton

Paint the inside green

Have some flowers already cut out- this technique takes the full session time. So, having some cut out helps with time management.  If the client would benefit from cutting the flowers out himself/herself, then do so.  I plan to go to a craft store and find some punch-out flowers.

Have all print-outs printed and ready.  Even though I cut flowers out, I had more sheets available for the client to do if desired.

Gather the materials listed and have them set out as options for the client to choose from.

Instructions:

The italicized portion is an example of what to say to direct the technique.. However, tailor it to your client.  I gave instructions with choices, but continued to reflect my client's feelings or content, track actions, broaden meaning, return responsibility, and build self-esteem.

Allow the client to choose the materials he or she wants to use.

Present the client with the materials. 

1) This is your thought garden.  Our thoughts and feelings influence our choices and actions. 

If you are working on identifying thoughts and feelings... Provide the client with the list of emotions worksheet...

2) On this sheet circle all the feelings you have had this week.

The different colored marbles/gems, rocks- river or pebbles, and dry beans represent thoughts and feelings.  Let the client choose which represent different types of thoughts and feelings.

3) Now choose what materials you want to represent your thoughts and put them in any way you want on this side of the garden.

Once the thoughts are placed in the garden, move on to the feeling side.

4) Now chose what materials you want to represent your feelings and put them in any way you want on this side of the garden.

The next step is for the client to make flowers to represent his/her thoughts and feelings shared.

5) You have fed your garden all your thoughts and feelings. Now, it's time to make flowers that represent all you thoughts and feelings.. Color in any way you want to show all of your feelings.. You can choose to color these flowers or make your own with construction paper.  

Once the client has completed the flowers, it is time to tape them on the pipe cleaners.

As the client tapes the flowers on the pipe cleaners, discuss what each flower represents.. discuss colors, patterns, feelings, and continue to use the prompt to explore choices we make when we are feeling certain ways.

6) I'm wondering about your flowers.. I noticed this one has a lot of yellow.. etc etc.. 
While you are discussing the flowers, broaden the meaning.  Discuss examples of a time the client felt [insert feeling].. Let the conversation flow to what the client feels like sharing..

When the process is over, the client can choose to keep his/her flowers.
The other materials are for staying in the play room.

If you are wanting to do this technique to build self-esteem, utilize the positive traits print-out.  Have the client circle all the positive traits he/she has.  Then allow the client to fill the garden with all the things that represent those traits.. Let it be a prompt for discussing the strengths of those traits or sharing a time they felt proud or were generous etc.

If you are wanting to focus more on self-talk, follow the instructions above, but incorporate the difference between positive and negative thoughts.. how thoughts influence your feelings and actions.. Instruct the client to choose a material for postive thoughts and a material for negative thoughts to fill his/her garden with.


** I do not have a picture of a completed thought garden due to keeping confidentiality with my clients.  Hopefully, my instructions were clear enough to visualize :) I hope another counselor finds this helpful. 

Grief & Encouragement

Grieving is a process.  It is not quick.  There is no simple solution or steps to follow.

It is a rollercoaster.  A rollercoaster of emotions.

As of late, I have been dealing with a lot. Let me be candid for a moment without disclosing specific details.  Attack after attack has been on our household.  My health, my husband's health, our son's health, financial attacks, and dreams being attacked.. Basically, I get up to be knocked down by something new weekly or even daily.  Stress. Worry.  Sickness.  Life is hard.

As I have been facing these attacks and clinging to God's strength, I have been lining up my encouragers.  Whenever I face a battle, I don't do it alone.  I have my God, my husband, my family, and select close friends.  With how hard things have been lately... I couldn't help but to notice a gaping hole... one of my strongest encouragers was gone.  My Aunt Cheryl.

Aunt Cheryl was a sounding board for encouragement.. Not only with her words to others, but with her life.  The battles she faced took no stronghold on her.  She was strong, courageous, graceful, kind, and invincible.  I could go on and on about how amazing she was. I love talking about her.  I miss her. Even though she is not here, I am still encouraged when I think about her.. when I think about things she has said to me.. things she faced and conquered with God's strength.. What a legacy.. Encouraging others beyond the grave.

Dealing with her death has been one of the hardest things I've gone through.  I cry.  I laugh.  I cry some more. It's like how can I be crying and smiling at the same time?! That is grief my friends.

Some days my heart literally, physically aches.. I look at my phone, and I am ready to dial her number only to realize I can't..  Other days, I look at pictures in my house of her or items that were handed down to me and smile at all the memories.. I feel peace and comfort knowing she is whole and in Heaven.  I will tell you.. Lately.. the grieving process has been difficult.  Through these battles, there have been days I just needed to talk to my Aunt Cheryl.  I needed her encouragement and positivity.. I needed her to pray with me.. It's been hard.. Since that can't happen, I focus on what I think she would say to me.. What I think she would do in my situation.. Then I pray hard.

Grieving a loved one isn't something that will be completed in a month, year, or even 5 years.. Over time, we learn to live with the memory of those we loved and lost.  We cherish those memories.. The memories begin to bring more smiles than they do tears.  They are never forgotten.  Take your time through the process.  Cry.. laugh.. maybe even at the same time.  You aren't crazy.  You are dealing with everything, and it is healthy.

I am thankful for my precious memories of my Aunt.  I am thankful I serve a God that fuels my strength, gives me peace, and comforts me.