Self-Esteem Building Technique

Hello, again. This is another post for my fellow counselors :)

This is a technique I developed for my client and the family.. Therefore, the family has to be active participants in their child's counseling.

Reasons to use this technique:

• Self-esteem building
• Strengthen family bonds
• Awareness for self and family
• Open the lines of communication within the family
• Focusing on the positives

Supplies

• Hard-stock white paper
• A couple sheets of computer paper
• Black sharpies
• Scissors
• Glue stick
• Watercolors & paintbrushes

Directions

1) Get the Parents involved.

Tell the parents or whoever is actively involved in therapy to both bring the client to session because they will be participating in an activity. If everyone cannot attend, have the absent person do their part of the activity and send it. 

Do a parent check-in at the beginning of session. I explain the activity to the parents. I give each parent a white paper and sharpie. I tell them to write everything they love about their child, positive traits, affirmations, and all of their child's talents on the paper. I send them to the waiting room to do this. When they are done, I ask they slip their papers face-down under the door. I explain to my client they are helping us with today's activity.

2) Inside work with the client.

Draw a shape (heart or circle etc.) or a bell shaped curve on the hard-stock, white paper.  Have the client fill the inside of the shape with all of her positive traits, qualities she likes about herself, and things she is good at (not likes to do; I explain the difference). 

This is a good time to discuss internal emotional strength. People around us make mistakes, fail, change, sometimes hurt us, or move away.  We have to be internally grounded.

Also, be engaged in what she is writing. When she puts down a trait she has demonstrated in a session or shared an example about, mention it.  If you don't have working knowledge of something she listed, ask her for an example. Let this be a time the counseling relationship is strengthened.

3) Putting it all together.

Once the client is done with her inside work, show her, her parents' lists.  Read them. Let it digest. Talk about how it feels to read those things. What matches on her list and their lists?  Is there anything she would add to her inside list? 

Then she cuts them out and pastes them on the outside of the shape.

4) Paints, Colors, & Feelings

Then she paints with watercolor all the feelings she feels.. I tell her to let the colors represent everything she felt when she read her parents lists and while making her list. We talk about colors.. What feelings do they represent.. to go deeper into everything.. Sometimes, more feelings come up as she paints.. I pay attention to how she is painting it and point out what I see.

ALWAYS use a black sharpie for the writing part :) It wont smear.

Variation:

Group:

The inside is everything they have learned, felt, and liked about group. The outside is for everyone in the group to write affirmations... Then paint as before.